Script

Good morning, I'm Doctor Dan, she's Nurse Betty, now what seems to be the problem?

Good morning, Doctor Dan, Nurse Betty. I'm Mrs. Lambchop and this is my son Stanley.

Nice to meet you, Andy.

His name is Stanley.

Now Andy, what seems to be the problem?

Well, last night the bulletin board above Stanley's bed fell on him.

Who's Stanley?

I am.

Then who's Andy?

There is no Andy.

And that's the problem?

The problem is the bulletin board fell on Stanley, and now he's flat.

Fat?

No, flat.

Fat?

(speaking very loudly)
No, flat!

Jump up here Andy, and let's check this out.

Ah-ha! I've got it! This boy has been horribly misdiagnosed. He's not fat at all!

She didn't say he was fat...

I'm telling you, the kid is not fat at all, Mrs. Porkchop

It's Lambchop.

Then who's Mrs. Porkchop? Never mind. Andy suffers from papyrus-magna-minimus.

That sounds terrible. What does it mean?

It means... uh... well...

It means Stanley's flat.

Of course he's flat  that's why we're here!

Stanley, how do you feel?

I feel fine.

You heard him, he feels fine. Call me if gets the sniffles or the flu! We got her insurance information? Don't forget your co-pay. Good day and good luck, Mrs. Porkchop.

It's Lambchop!

Come on Stanley! Let's get out of here!