Audition Central: Thoroughly Modern Millie JR.

Script: Bun Foo

CHING HO, BUN FOO

(in unison)
Huh?

(MRS. MEERS stops in her tracks, clearly annoyed. She removes a dreaded Chinese/English dictionary from her pocket. MRS. MEERS crosses to BUN FOO as she flips through the dictionary, painstakingly sounding out each word.)

MRS. MEERS

Bun Foo. Sung Ethel heui Buddha. Sei bak. Cash.

(BUN FOO indicates that he understands. MRS. MEERS crosses to CHING HO as she flips through the dictionary.)

As for you, Ching Ho, room service& room service& room service!

(MRS. MEERS tries to sound it out.)

F-f-f-f-f-fffffff& Famayayayayayayay& .

(turns to CHING HO for help)

CHING HO

Fòng möüh yühn.
[SUPERTITLE: Room service.]

MRS. MEERS

For Miss Dorothy.

(crosses to laundry cart and addresses ETHEL inside it)

Dear Ethel, don't think of it as being kidnapped; think of it as my saving you from years of acting classes and diction exercises and doors slammed in your face.

(ETHEL, clearly gagged, tries to speak from inside cart.)

There, there, no need to thank me.

(MRS. MEERS exits.)

CHING HO

(regarding MRS. MEERS)
Ngôh gök daak kêuih hóu tôu yìm.
[SUPERTITLE: I don't like that woman.]

BUN FOO

Aàhn hàih kêuih hóu sìk nám.
[SUPERTITLE: She's got a good head for business.]

CHING HO

Chéen! Chéen! Sêhng yäht döu göng chéen.
[SUPERTITLE: Money! That's all you care about.]

BUN FOO

Gáng hâih lä, fáai di wân döu chéen, jaûh fáai di dâai äh mä gwò lêih a mä.
[SUPERTITLE: Darn right, because the faster we earn it, the sooner we bring Mama over from Hong Kong.]

(A short beat, then CHING HO makes a decision.)