SIDE 1

And then what happened? I miraculously appeared and said:
(full of dramatic flair)
Good Geppetto, you have given so much happiness to others. You deserve to have your wish come true.
(waving her magic wand)
Little Pinocchio, prove yourself brave, truthful, and unselfish, and someday you will be a real boy.

(coming to life and seeing GEPPETTO)
Daddy!

Pinocchio?

(PINOCCHIO runs across the stage to GEPPETTO and gives him a big hug. GEPPETTO melts into the embrace.)

(to the FAIRIES IN TRAINING)
Listen to what he said next.

(still in the moment)
Finally, a boy of my own.

(self-satisfied)
Wish granted!

(breaking out of the moment)
Hold it, hold it, hold it! That was before I knew what he was like. Things started to go wrong the very next day.

Like what?

Well, like... for instance... You know, this would be a lot easier if you could just use your magic to take us to that day, and I could show you.

(The BLUE FAIRY sighs.)

 Use your magic. Use your magic. That s all I hear from you people. Okay, fine  we ll go see his first day.

SIDE 2

(in disbelief)
You make children?!

Not just any children.
(lowering his voice to a whisper)
Perfect children. We used to have them the old fashioned way, but it was too unpredictable.

People had boys when they wanted girls.

Children would misbehave. Break things.

(pointedly)
Sometimes, they would even run away.

(MARIA and BERNARDO gasp!)

This way, there is nothing left to chance!
(calling)
Junior!

(JUNIOR flips some switches.)

Ready to go! We just need the last two inputs.

(BUONRAGAZZO turns to MARIA and BERNARDO.)

Okay. Have you made your final decision?

We ve really agonized. But... we were thinking blonde.

Blonde, molto stupendo. And eyes?

(clasping MARIA s hands)
Blue.

Benissimo! A classic combination. One blue-eyed blonde coming right up.

SIDE 3

(Crash!! PINOCCHIO has knocked down the train, sending toys, tools, and other materials clattering to the floor.)

Pinocchio!

I didn t do it! It wasn t me. I was just sitting here, listening to you, when... this wind came in through the window and... uh... knocked the shelf down and...

(PINOCCHIO s nose grows longer. PINOCCHIO stops, alarmed.)

What s happening to my nose??

You can always tell when a little boy lies, Pinocchio.

But I m not! I m not lying! I m not, I m not, I m not!

(PINOCCHIO s nose grows longer with each lie.)

Obviously, your nose doesn t agree.
(mustering his  fatherly abilities)
You know what? You re grounded!

(PINOCCHIO starts to cry. GEPPETTO softens.)

Well, you don t have to cry about it.

(PINOCCHIO cries harder.)

Oh, come on, stop that.

(PINOCCHIO continues. GEPPETTO feels terrible. He tries to think of something to say, but can t. He is suddenly struck with inspiration. GEPPETTO reaches into his pocket and then holds both hands in front of him.)

Pick a hand.

(PINOCCHIO just keeps crying.)

Go ahead, pick a hand.

(PINOCCHIO bats his hands away.)

(through his tears)
I don t want to pick a hand.

(GEPPETTO is at first stunned, then grows annoyed.)

Fine. Then cry if that s what you want to do.

(PINOCCHIO runs off.)

SIDE 4

Hello there!

(STROMBOLI speaks for his MARIONETTES in a high-pitched voice. This would resemble ventriloquism, were his lips not so obviously moving.)

Hello!

Hello!

This is a bad time.

It s never a bad time for Stromboli s Amazing Marionette Show!

(STROMBOLI bounces the MARIONETTES back and forth.)

LA LA LA LA LA!

(with growing desperation)
Perhaps acrobatics are more your speed?

(SIGNORA ROSATI passes with her son FIORELLO as STROMBOLI flips the MARIONETTES upside down in a ridiculous acrobatic display. She pauses for a moment.)

Look, Fiorello  it s that tragic puppeteer again: Signor Stromboli.

His shows stink!

(SIGNORA ROSATI and FIORELLO turn and exit.)

(to the audience)
Everyone s a critic.